This just in: Gary the Goat has been exonerated by a Sydney court.
Gary had been charged with eating flowers in a Sydney street, but the magistrate threw the case out on the grounds that 'there was no evidence Mr Bazoobi [Gary's owner] brought Gary there with the intention of vandalising vegetation.'
HAH. If I had been called as a witness, I could have told a different story.
I met Gary the Goat in Fremantle late last year when he was tethered to a street tree near the Juicy Beetroot Cafe, and eating vine leaves off a nearby grapevine fed to him by kind passers-by.
I stopped to have a perfectly innocent chat with him and give him a pat on his head, which he seemed to enjoy, until I realised that Gary was stealthily chewing my shopping bag from Myer with my brand new navy blue linen trousers in them.
We struggled briefly, and I won, but not without a mangled bag. There were several witnesses, including one older lady who was pretty much bent double with laughter.
So Gary has gotten off this time, but I hope this Sydney appearance at least goes on his record for future reference.